


The Allegedly Solved Mystery of The tipped Over Truck

by Falco276



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-01
Updated: 2014-01-01
Packaged: 2018-01-07 02:07:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1114253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Falco276/pseuds/Falco276
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ever wondered how that truck near Memory's Skyscraper got tipped over? Join Organization 13 in this humorous story and find out exactly how it even happened. Also discover what squirrels and screamo bands have anything to do with it. Free cookies inside! Originally written by Crimson Oblivion from Fanfiction.net. Used permission to post her stories here.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Allegedly Solved Mystery of The tipped Over Truck

_**Thanks for choosing to read this story! You have been given cookies! :) Anyway, enjoy this crazy piece of mine.** _

* * *

The World That Never Was: a lonely, dark place where thirteen Nobodies roamed about, fighting heartless and collecting hearts. These thirteen Nobodies control the world from a large floating fortress that hovers over Dark City.

The Nobodies were strong, fearless, agile, competent-

"Ahhh!" A high pitched shrilling girly scream shouted that vibrated the entire castle. OK forget I said fearless.

Xemnas, leader of Organization Thirteen was sitting at the kitchen table in the Kitchen of Consumption with a cup of black coffee to his right and a newspaper in his hands. On his face were thin framed reading glasses. He looked ecstatic about something.

"Saix come quick!" He hollered as his eyes never left the paper. Suddenly the kitchen door burst open and slammed into the white wall. A blue haired man with an X mark between his yellow eyes came jogging in.

"What is it superior?" He asked while catching his breath. He took a few steps forward and stood at Xemnas' side.

"Did you know that they're having a sale on fire breathing squirrels?" He asked excitedly while pointing to the black and white ad at the bottom left corner of the paper.

Saix squinted his eyes and leaned his head forward. "Ah, so they are."" He replied. "But what of it Lord Xemnas?" He asked while turning his gaze to the superior.

"I need them, Saix." Xemnas simply replied while roughly setting the paper onto the hickory wood table.

The bluenette raised a brow and crossed his arms. "Superior, did you take your medicine today?" He asked.

"HOW DARE YOU DEFY ME!" Xemnas bellowed while standing up and staring face to face with Saix. His eyes glowed red and foam started pouring out of his mouth.

The blue haired man's eyes grew wide and he took a few steps backwards. "All right superior, we'll go get those squirrels." He replied after swallowing hard.

"Gather every member and we will go in our vehicle." Xemnas demanded calmly as he sipped his cup of Joe.

With a slight nod Saix turned on his heel to leave but then stopped in place. "Which vehicle?" He asked without turning around.

The superior set down his cup roughly. "My favorite one. You should know by now, Saix." He replied with the tone of annoyance.

"So the Strawberry Mobile complete with cupcake seats and frosting tires with the plate entitled 'BRRYGRL'?" The blunette inquired.

Xemnas sighed. "No!" He then groaned. "The truck, Saix! The truck for Pete's sake!"

With a nod, the bluenette ran out of there.

_**Meanwhile…** _

Saix had gathered all the members together and was now standing outside in front of a dark green hauler that was attached to a long silver trailer. Saix hopped into the passenger's seat and the other eleven piled in the back. Everyone was waiting for Xemnas.

"Why are we even here?" Xigbar questioned while taking a seat on the cold floor up against the trailer wall on the right.

"Pfft, beats me." Larxene replied while taking a seat besides Zexion on the back wall.

"I wonder if they'll get us ice cream…" Roxas pondered out loud while tapping a finger to his chin. He sat in between his best friends Axel and Demyx.

Larxene, the only female gritted her teeth and growled and the blonde haired Nobody.

The trailer wasn't that small. Everyone had enough room to stretch themselves out comfortably and square shaped windows were on the front and back wall. One viewed the rear and the other viewed Xemnas and Saix.

Vexen, the creepy blonde scientist sat alone on the right wall corner and was quietly laughing maniacally to himself. Who knows what that one was thinking.

Lexaeus sat on the left wall beside Demyx with a puzzle ball in his hands.

Zexion sat beside Larxene against the corner of the right and back wall and read his Lexicon.

Xaldin sat against the front wall and was flipping through a beauty magazine. Axel sat on the left wall and next to him was Roxas and besides him was Demyx. The red haired pyromaniac, along with his friend Roxas, brought their PSP's. Demyx was bopping his head to some music that was on his blue IPod.

Luxord, the blonde haired Brit was shuffling a deck of cards in his hands. He was obsessed with those things. He sat next to Marluxia on the front wall besides Xaldin.

Finally, Xemnas had opened the squeaky truck door and hopped into the driver's seat.

"Superior, where are we going?" Asked Demyx through the opened window on the back wall.

Xemnas slammed his door closed and placed the key in the ignition. "WE GET THERE WHEN WE GET THERE!" He yelled furiously.

"But Superior, I didn't ask-"

"QUIET!" Xemnas boomed, cutting off Demyx. He put the car in drive and sped down the narrow paved road that eventually lead to the downtown area of Dark City.

"Saix," Marluxia said a little loudly so his voice was audible over the rustling of the wind. "Do you mind turning on the radio to station 106.6?" He asked.

Without a reply, the bluenette pressed a round black button next to the 'In Case Of Marluxia' button and turned the dial to the station he had requested. Soft, classical music with violins and a piano started to play.

"That's girl music." Axel commented with a sneer and the rolling of his eyes. He reached into his cloak pocket and pulled out his red IPod and turned up his own music. Loud guitar riffs and drums were heard along with a male voice screaming. Everyone in the trailer covered their ears.

"Turn that nonsense off, Axel. As we can see you have no taste in music." Marluxia stated as he grabbed Axel's device when he was too busy bopping his head to it and turned down the volume.

The red haired man snatched his IPod back and yelled, "Screamo!"

"Classical!" Marluxia argued.

"Screamo!"

"Classical!"

In the middle of their argument Lexaeus, the Silent Hero pulled out an old tape player from his cloak pocket and pressed the play button and children started singing 'I'm A Little Teapot'. But it was barely even audible due to Axel's IPod on full blast.

Xemnas' grip on the steering wheel tightened and his blood boiled. "QUIET!" He bellowed while suddenly slamming in his breaks which made everyone froze. Axel turned off his music along with Lexaeus. They knew what the consequences were for getting the superior upset.

Xemnas turned around in his seat and leaned his head towards the window and gazed at the two arguing Nobodies. "You…" He started in a deep tone which gave the pink haired man chills.

Xemnas continued to stare evilly and not a word escaped his mouth.

"You do know that if you don't keep your mouths shut I am going to pin you to my clothes line and force you to wear women's undergarments and have you hold signs that say, 'I failed Kindergarten Math' and post your pictures all over the internet?" He inquired while not even blinking.

The two Nobodies gulped and Larxene snickered at the thought of the two pinned to the clothes line. The Superior then turned back around and started to drive again.

Everyone was quiet the entire trip and the only sound that was heard was the classical music that was still playing.

_**About ten minutes later…** _

Xemnas had finally pulled into the parking lot of Dark City's 'Mad Milk Cartons and Happy Dentists Random Shop' and parked into the spot that was closest to the door because he's just that lazy. He took the key out of the ignition and quickly shoved it into his pocket and everyone climbed out of the vehicle.

"Why are we at the Random Shop?" Demyx inquired while staring up at the long, colorful sign above the small, white shop.

"We need Fire Breathing Squirrels and they are fifty percent off IF you can catch them." Xemnas explained as he shut his door.

"So that's why you brought us all here…" Larxene trailed off while crossing her arms. "What a waste of time."

Xemnas then lead the way into the shop and walked up to the counter. The place was dark and creepy. Bird cages hung from the ceiling with skeletons inside. Freakishly designed mirrors hung on the wall that changed the shape of objects. And purple monkeys in airplanes flew around.

"We're here for the Fire Breathing Squirrel thing." The Superior stated while propping an elbow onto the marble top desk.

A person stood behind the desk, wearing a witch hat that was angled down toward their face so it wasn't visible. "I'm terribly sorry," The voice of a female started in a French accent. "But that boy took them all." She raised her hand and pointed to the direction of the shops door. Xemnas spun around and saw three kids; one was a girl with short, auburn hair. The other was a boy with long silver hair. And thirdly, the one who bought them all was a spiky haired brunette boy who held the small squirrels in his arms.

"Sora…" The superior mumbled through gritted teeth.

Xaldin huffed and was filing his nails. "Well this was a waste of time; I could've had straight hair by now." He then rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"I COULD'VE BLOWN UP THE UNIVERSE!" Vexen exclaimed while throwing his hands in the air. Everyone stared at him and he lowered his arms and coughed. "Uh I mean, finished my Dragon Tales coloring book!"

"I could've written down all the things that I could've done." Zexion muttered while staring down at the floor with a sigh. Larxene smacked him on the back.

"Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view." She said sarcastically.

Zexion picked up his head and narrowed his eyebrows and stared at her. "Does everyone visualize duct tape over your mouth so early into the conversation?"

Larxene took a step back and sneered. "Pardon me," She started in her sarcastic voice with a smile. "But you must have mistaken me for someone who actually gives a care." She then turned on her heel and took a couple of steps away so her back was facing him.

"AFTER THAT BOY!" Xemnas demanded while pointing a finger in Sora's direction as he left the shop with his friends. The superior ran out of the place and got into his truck, totally forgetting about everyone else and sped off after Sora and his gang. Riku, the silver haired one was driving a black convertible with a license plate that read '1M2SEXY'.

Xemnas' speed was incinerating and he was so close to Riku's car that he almost tailgated him. He was determined to crash into the black convertible and steal those squirrels.

_**Back at the shop…** _

"Have you considered suing your brains for non-support?" Zexion questioned while crossing his arms and raising an eyebrow at Larxene. She was boiling with anger. Her fists were clenched at her sides and looked as if she could explode any second.

The rest of the members had gathered around the two, forming a circle and chanting them to fight.

"You're so stupid; you'd trip over a cordless phone!" Larxene argued while placing her hands on her hips.

"Guys!" Demyx interrupted. "Look at the T.V!" He then pointed towards the wall behind the desk where the news channel was on. An accident was shown and a woman reporter was talking.

Everyone besides Larxene and Zexion gathered in front of the desk.

"Isn't that Xemnas?" Roxas inquired while pointing at the screen and raising an eyebrow.

"Sure is." Axel replied while folding his arms over his chest.

"Lady Luck was unfortunately not with him today." Luxord muttered while shuffling his deck of cards while exhaling through his nose.

Larxene and Zexion didn't have a clue as to what was going on and continued arguing.

"Why don't you slip into something more comfortable?" Zexion inquired while gesturing a hand towards her with a smirk. Seconds passed and Larxene looked quite disgusted. "Like a coma." He finished.

_**What happened with Xemnas...** _

The superior was speeding and was slightly driving on the right of Riku's car, hoping to crash into it and make him turn to the left and crash into a building.

Once he was sure they weren't going to speed up he pressed his foot onto the gas as hard as he could and instantly Sora and his friends sped off, making Xemnas crash right into a flight of stairs that were a part of the Memory's Skyscraper.

_**Back at the shop…** _

"How in Kingdom Hearts did that happen?" Xigbar inquired as he set his elbows onto the desk and held his face in his hands.

"Anything could happen, this IS Xemnas we're talking about." Marluxia replied.

"If you had another brain…" Larxene started while smirking a little and taking a couple steps closer to Zexion. "It would be lonely."

He swallowed hard and took a tiny step backwards. This was getting out of hand. This argument was turning into flirting now, and only Larxene could do that.

"If you took an IQ test," She started and placed a hand on his chest. "The score would be in negatives."

"OH MY HEARTS!" Marluxia screeched as he turned around and pointed near Larxene and Zexion who then stared wide eyed at him. "THIS RANDOM LINT IS ON SALE!" He then ran passed the two and picked up the balls of lint from the shelf and brought it up to the counter. "I'll take ten!" He exclaimed as he pulled out some munny from his pocket.

Luxord then face palmed himself. "We need to get out of here." He stated and opened up a door to darkness and stepped through it along with everyone else.

_**With Xemnas…** _

The superior had managed to escape his tipped over vehicle and was standing on the pavement with his hands thrown in the air. "Kingdom Hearts…" He started calmly. "Look at what you've done!" He exclaimed while tears filled his eyes. He then got down onto his knees and hugged his truck. "My baby." He muttered. "It's OK daddy's got you shh everything's gonna be-"

Suddenly police sirens were heard and the sound of car doors slammed and police men surrounded the Superior and he put his hands up with a straight face.

"Turd nuggets…" He mumbled through gritted teeth. He stood up on his feet and stared at each cop into the eyes and made a run for it. The police men pulled out their taser guns and chased after him. The superior was out of breath and looked behind him to see how close they were and noticed the stun guns in their hands.

"YOU'LL NEVER GET ME WITH THOSE SASSY TASERS!" Xemnas screamed at the top of his lungs as he was being pig piled by the cops.

* * *

_**End! Don't forget to leave a review!** _


End file.
